Despite what everyone may think, I’m horrible at socializing. I’m slightly awkward when I’m around people I know, but around complete strangers, I act as if I were raised by wolves and this is my first time interacting with creatures outside of my pack. I’m the kind of person who is completely content with sitting in the corner of a party or social gathering with a book and a glass of coke. Do I look out of place? Like a polka dotted bear at a vegetarian fundraiser. Do I secretly judge every person in the room who stares in my direction? Well, let’s just say my moral compass almost always points south.
But the alternative for me is even more frightening. I clam up in social settings. I giggle at words like “duty,” ”gesticulate,” and “responsibilities.” My face turns bright red, making any make-up or food on my face non-existent. I make inappropriate jokes and never remember anyone’s names. I once held a ten minute conversation with a lawyer about asparagus. It ended with him handing me a business card to get me to shut up. Needless to say, he avoided me for the rest of the evening. I suspect the card may have been a fake that lawyers and executives keep in the “other” back pocket reserved for people like me.
My husband, on the other hand, is just brilliant. He shines when he’s in a room full of strangers and usually ends up leaving only after he’s made friends with everyone in the room. (He may own a mind control device.) He knows how to judge a person within a few moments of discussion and then change his demeanor to fit their own; the end result makes him come across as incredibly charming. And then of course he ruins it by introducing me while I drool through the side of my mouth babbling about sock drawers, Final Fantasy, and how sometimes I write that them thar books. Har har har.
The kind of interaction, like most things in my life, made me think of writing. Everything I write comes from real life. Well, that and the creepy inner workings of my brain, but really, I can’t control that. (Nor do I try to.) Even if I can never be the world’s best public speaker or most charming party guest, I can use the same tactics employed by dear old Hubs in my writing. You see, no one enjoys a writer who shies away from the realities of characters. (And by no one I am of course generalizing, using my own preferences. It’s my blog. I make my own statistics.) Why watch the action from a distant corner when you could jump into it like a rodeo clown and get to know everyone in the crowd? (Or really, just the bull. Okay, it was a bad analogy. You know what I mean….right?) When it comes to my characters, I like to be in their faces, learning about who they are, what they do, what makes them tick.
What’s your approach to meeting characters? Do you watch them from a distance? Jump on top of them like a crazy person? Have any weird or embarrassing stories from social gatherings? I want to hear them all.